How to get your ex boyfriend back - Why your next move will make it or break it.

Published: 29th November 2011
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After the breakup you're left standing alone. Your ex isn't returning your calls or texts and you feel him slowly slipping away and what's worse is you have no idea how to get him back or even where to start.

If this is where you're at right now, take comfort. Everyone from every walk of life at some point in time has broken up with someone, so even though you may feel alone, you're not. Many couples break up but more importantly many of these couples also make up.

It's important for you to know that no matter how your relationship ended or what caused it, you can always get back with your ex. I want you to take a minute to stop and picture yourself alone in an open space.

Next, imagine that there are several different paths surrounding you in every direction. These paths represent the different roads you can take to get your boyfriend back. Most will lead you away from him, but there are a few that will land you right back in his arms.

Knowing what paths to take or avoid determines whether or not you'll end up with your boyfriend again. Choosing the wrong one will push him further away from you, but choosing the right one will lead you right back to him. And if you do it right, not only will you be back together, but you'll do it in record time.

There's one thing you have that gives you an advantage over everyone else and that's knowledge. You may not know it, but getting back together with your ex is a skill that needs to be learned an implemented and the more you understand your ex's mindset and like's and dislike's the better your chances are of saying and doing the right things to get him back.

At the end of the day it's all about how you time things with him. You still need to choose the right path to go down, but more importantly you need to do it at the correct speed. Move to fast and he'll bolt the other way. Don't move at all and he'll lose interest in you and your window of opportunity will be gone.

Knowing where you need to start is the most important thing here. There are many fast methods and techniques out there to help you to take those first steps along the right path. Uncover what you should and shouldn't do in the next paragraphs before you make your next move.

The First Thing To Avoid After Your Breakup

The time period right after the break up is the most crucial one because the actions you take or don't take will most likely determine the difficulty of getting back together. Making the wrong moves here can bring you big problems because they do things for the sake of looking interested in getting back together.

It's important for you to know at this time that your mistakes will be put under the microscope. I know deep down your gut reaction is to make a move and do everything possible to halt the breakup. The harsh reality is that doing something right now would make the situation worse, not better.

You're going to be at your lowest point emotionally right now. You've got thoughts running through your head and things you wish you'd have said or done differently play over and over agin.

Despair, misery, anger, resentment... it doesn't take alot right now to do or say something you'll regret later and any over-reaction by you could drive him further away and make any chance of getting back together more difficult or maybe even impossible.

Chasing, pestering, pleading, stalking... you might think these actions will bring him back to you, but they won't. Doing these things only hurts you and makes you look desperate.

Let me take you into the mind of a guy after a breakup:

"When I break up with a girl the last thing I need from her is to hear from her non stop because every conversation is centered around the relationship and getting back together."

"It's tough to talk to her understanding she still wants you back, sometimes you don't know what you should say. And whatever you do say won't make her happy, so the ideal thing to do is to avoid her."

"If she keeps calling and texting things tend to get out of hand fast, and soon she's angry at you as well as being upset. Breaking up is stressful enough without the additional drama."

You see, there's no early quick fix to your break up and when you move too quickly too early, your ex boyfriend's first reaction is to stay away from you not draw closer to you. It's possible you could make him angry and resentful which could make things awkward for you both and when you're finally ready to reunite with him he'll remember the awkward feelings and it will be a roadblock for you.

Your Opening Move After The Breakup

Believe it or not, you need to let him just walk away at this point.

That's all there is to it. When you let your ex out of the relationship without fighting or bickering you maintain the respect that he still has for you. This is going to work in your favor later on because having his respect will go a long way to getting back together.

What's even better is as your ex and you part ways, he'll wonder why you're not chasing him. Chances are he expected a huge fight with you but you turned the tables on him by not doing anything and as a result set him off his game.

Ending the relationship on good terms will work wonders for you. Not only will it drive him crazy, but he'll feel like he was rejected also.

While he started the separation, he relied on the fact that you still loved him and banked on the fact that you'd make an attempt to talk him out of it. Without doubt he expected you to chase him and try and keep the connection going.

But instead of the reaction he expected from you, you've just up and walked away from the relationship and he's left standing there wondering how much you really value the relationship. He might even think that you're into someone else and for all he knows you're into the breakup as much as he is.

Why Agreeing With The Breakup Works

You might have read alot about this theory already and that's because accepting your fate and the situation instead of fighting it puts you in a position of strength.

In order to wind up back together, any action you take ought to be done from a position of power and control. If you don't have this, you won't get very far.

Consider this one point. Your ex had an expectation as to how you would be affected by the breakup and every time you do something unanticipated you get more power and control over what will happen next. By going against the grain in a breakup you're ultimately taking charge and steering it back to reconcilliation. That's how you get him back.

He can't argue with you when you go along with the breakup because you throw him off when you're on the same page.

What Should You Do If The Breakup Has Already Happened?

In the event you and your ex-boyfriend have already been broken up for a while then agreeing to the breakup might not be good enough at this point, especially if you fought against the breakup to begin with.

Luckily for you it's not too late for you to take a similar course of action. You can still detach yourself from the relationship and show your ex that you've made peace with the situation and accepted the breakup. Learning how to implement this simple yet effective trick can put you back on track to getting him back.

The best part about this is that even if you haven't talked to your ex in a while, this trick opens the door again and allows you to re-enter the picture and capture his attention and show him that you're moving on without him.

Once you've mastered this procedure the next thing you have to do is use the detachment technique to pull him nearer and when you've done that there are 5 minor adjustments you can make that will make him want you back.

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